we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize