so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
