well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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