Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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