A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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