used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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