i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
