That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I woke up under a house in Key West
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize