fuck your aforementioned shoe
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
So vagazzling was a success
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
