Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
