ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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