That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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