you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
