Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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