She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
