Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize