Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
