I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
