You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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