do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
