She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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