when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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