so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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