Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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