My pussy is not your playground.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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