I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
