I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
