I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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