i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
