her vagine was all disorganized.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
