So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
