She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
