bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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