Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
