Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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