I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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