You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
