So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
