dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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