That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
