She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
