3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
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