Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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