He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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