so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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