Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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