Im at strip club and am horny
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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