Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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