I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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