no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
They took my balls.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
