i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
This is the high leading the old right now
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
